Monthly Archives: April 2006

The Gamma Song

Well, the idle mind is the devil’s workshop, but I’d say that a busy one, is a storehouse of crazy, arbit, stupid, meaningless & unwanted creativity. This time during the endsems, Shankar & I came up with “The Gamma Song“. It’s another parody of the famous(?) Llama Song[1] Check it out if you like Physics/Maths/Stupidity or just have a lot of free time.

The Lyrics:

here's a gamma,there's a gamma
and another little gamma,
real gamma
virtua' gamma,
gamma gamma
look!

gamma gamma,
Riemann
gamma
tangent
Wick
rotate-a
gamma
gamma gamma,
squareroot
gamma
gamma gamma
look!

I was once a Tensor,
I lived in a space,
but I never saw the way
the indices were raised
I was just an A-mu,
but that fixed a gauge,
And now listen little child,
to this verbiage

did you ever see a gamma,
miss a gamma
hit a gamma,
gamma's gamma
curve of gamma
gamma gamma
look!

Affine gamma,
Dirac gamma,
Chiral gamma,
Basu,
gamma,
gamma with psi bar
a drama,
gamma gamma
look!

is it all in bold now?
is this all so weird?
is it made of tangent bundle?
h-cross
sigma
beard
Now our song is losing spin,
we've run out of ... look!
time for me to retire now,
and become a crook!

QFT … or why you should be glad I’m not a poet

Quantum Field Theory, it's come a long way,
Since Oscar & Walter started out one day,
Rewriting Schrödinger's equation in a relativistic way,
But their effort was partly in vain,
For the electron did not see fit to deign,
Being a spinor with spin h-cross by two,
Physicists they were left without a clue.

Then along came Paul, stared into the fire,
Pulled out an equation with anticommuting stuff,
Alack! Alas! The equation seemed wrong,
Negative energy eigenvalues it did acquire,
There was a solution, though it was rough,
Fill the vacuum with an electron sea,
Now if there is a hole where an electron should be,
Why! That is a positron can't you see?
Those were the days of old QFT

Skip forward in time, two dozen more years,
And Richard and Julian, and Shinichiro San,
They smoothened the wrikles and layed rest to fears,
And things it seem'd were falling in place,
Till other new problems blew up in our face,

Are neutrinos massless? Are quarks confined?
Is Gravity quantised? Howe'er shall we find?
M-theory, and unification, why it's all still a puzzle,
And science marches on from hurdle to hurdle!
From this eternal story we can surely surmise,
That theories are made, and problems are solved,
These theories then fade, as new problems arise.